Wednesday, March 23, 2011

Tracy Anderson is an evil misogynist bitch

I don’t know how many people know you Tracy Anderson is, but she is pure evil. Several months ago many people in the fitness community mocked a video of hers where she was training Gwyneth Paltrow and said that no woman should ever lift a weight over five lbs. A totally laughable statement considering women have to pick up things that weigh more than that just about every day (groceries? their purse? babies? my cock?). Pretty silly, but at least in that context seemed relatively harmless. That is, until I read this article.

Pretty twisted shit right? Follow Ms. Anderson’s diet plan and you can be just like Gwyn! Get a skeletal frame that will leave you so weak you won’t be able to pick up your daily meal replacement shake! Dizzy spells! Osteoporosis! And probably a heart attack in five years! The fact that this woman can run a business off a plan that will literally kill her clients is sickening. I can’t wait for the next diet fad that recommends heroine addiction or chemotherapy as effective weight loss tools.

Seriously ladies, there are plenty of HEALTHY ways to get lean and fit without irreparably hurting yourself. Here’s one, oh and here’s one more. And no, goddamnit! You will not turn into Nicole Bass by doing any of this! Unless of course you are already cycling stanozolol and deadlifting three times your bodyweight. Below is a little table that my unqualified, uneducated ass thinks should be the MINIMUM strength requirements for women, and one even for all my pansy ass man friends.

Women:

3 strict pull ups, 10 push-ups, 1 back squat with 3/4 your body weight on the bar.

Men:

5 strict pull ups, 30 push-ups, 1 back squat with 1.5 times your body weight on the bar.

These standards are not hard to attain, and any basic training protocol should get you there with minimal effort. If you need help reaching any of these goals, let me know and I can point you to several beginner plans that will get you stronger, leaner, and won't kill you in the process.

In other news, I've decided to take on the 60 day PLP challenge. If anyone wants to join me, I'd love the company.

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